What are things you can do in 3 minutes? List them.
- Brush my teeth.
- Clean my entire house (but I don't, because I don't like to show off. It's nicer to just let it get dirtier and dirtier and then drag my feet and make it take hours. That way nobody gets jealous. I'm a giver).
- Eat dinner. Because I'm a mother.
- Shower. See #3.
- Come to the realization that this is a ridiculous writing prompt and nobody wants to read anything else I can do in 3 minutes.
- Write one more thing just because my 3 minutes isn't technically up and you should know I can also type 279 words in 3 minutes with 100% accuracy. No, really. I can. The Internet says so.
Your email friend from Alaska sends you a penguin. Write about your first day with your new pet.
OK. Look. First of all, is this, like, a virtual penguin? And if it's a real penguin, why does my email friend even have my home address? That makes no sense. It's an email friendship! I don't give my home address to strangers on the Internet, and kids, neither should you. P.S.A. You're welcome. Furthermore, I would never have an email friend because that's lame. And if I did have an email friend, he or she would most definitely not be from Alaska, because Alaska hates me.
Most troubling of all, there are no penguins in Alaska. Google it. Honestly.
In conclusion, I would find it incredibly suspicious if somebody claiming to be from Alaska mailed me a penguin, and I would have to assume the penguin was somehow booby trapped and programmed to kill me. I would therefore be forced to destroy the penguin. And now I'm a penguin murderer. This is a terrible writing prompt.
Pick a wild animal to keep as a pet.
Seriously? I just killed a penguin, you guys. What is it with you?? You're sick.
Were you able to kill the penguin in 3 minutes? Might be a hidden talent that will come in handy if you ever go to Alaska & decide to hunt down your so-called email friend.
ReplyDelete@Nysha
ReplyDeleteBrilliant. Just brilliant. Thank you.